Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Claire chris paul steve & dave

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

Das Stig is a manaic!

Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

Whatsapp Status

on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.