A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

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These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

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There are signs directing you away from Birmingham but nothing enticing you in.

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

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Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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we wait with anticipation

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Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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Assessing Hammond's crash: Clarkson: "you can see from the tape that the tyre is starting to come apart. Now why didn't you spot that?!" Hammond: "I had a lot on: I was doing 288 mph." Clarkson: "What do you mean you had a lot on? I can be in the office on the phone, doing the paperwork, kids are shouting at me, wife etc, but if a lion walks in, I'm going to notice it!"

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

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The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

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On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

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I’d rather go to work on my hands and knees than drive there in a Ford Galaxy. Whoever designed the Ford Galaxy upholstery had a cauliflower fixation. I would rather have a vasectomy than buy a Ford Galaxy.

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This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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