On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

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(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

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POWER!!!!!!!!!!

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Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

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When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel “When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire. But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’ They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.

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In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled – usually when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was.

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Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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On the Mercedes CLS55 AMG “It sounds like Barry White eating wasps.”

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When describing the Mazda Demio-"Yes I know it'll take you to the shops, but then so will a pogo stick!

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

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I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

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Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze.

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On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

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A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

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I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

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What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

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The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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