It's like being tangled in a douvet on a hot night, I hate it!" Describibg one of the awful American pieces of tat on the good bad and the ugly dvd. Brilliant

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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M3 drivers have no friends.

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[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Whatsapp Status

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

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Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

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LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

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Das Stig is a manaic!

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

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Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

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The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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we wait with anticipation

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herro am spoderman

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Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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On the Renault Clio V6 “I think the problem is that it’s French. It’s a surrendermonkey.”

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I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

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I was reading The Mirror the other day and came across a letter from a reader who wrote, 'I was riding my bike to work when this red Ferrari pulled up next to me. Out of the window, Jeremy Clarkson shouted 'Get a car', and drove off.' What I actually said was, 'Get a car you hatchet faced, leaf-eating N**i.

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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