- Clarksonisms

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Yes, it's firm, but it's not uncomfortable. I mean compared to hanging from a bird's nest...by your fingernails...a million feet above some pointy boulders, for example.

Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

[On Hammond's Dolomite Sprint] My washing machine moves around the kitchen faster than that!

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

POWER!!!!!!!!!!

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

On James May: "He also hasn't got a penis cause it came off once."

Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

"How do I tell James to slow down?"

Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

This is a Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that’s much to shout about. That’s like saying ‘Oh good, I’ve got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases!'

Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

Biathletes need to eat 6,000 calories a day: six thousand! That’s the equivalent of two pounds of butter, 70 slices of bread, 112 eggs, 86 tabs of yogurts, 28 potatoes, 117 biscuits and 21 Twix bars. On that basis, I could be an Olympic biathlete!

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

Clarksonisms

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