On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

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Every year, the world's Golf GTI enthusiasts congregate in a field in Austria, and they talk about fuel injection and wear jumpers with "GTI" on them. Frankly I'd rather blow-torch my nipples off.

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Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

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Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

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[Stretch Limos Challenge] - ... for some extraodinary reason the rules say you can't drive a 46-foot car on the public highway, so I had to do some surgery...

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I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

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Best Driving Roads: Yep, ah, It’s unlikely to be here cause everyone does 5mph (N. America), it’s not going to be here cause everyone is on drugs (S. America), that’s just all full of Ox (Africa), Al Gore says that’s gone (Antarctica) so its not going to be down there, That’s just all Spiders (Australia), sign posts are all full of gibberish (Japan), They’re all communist (Kazakhstan/Russia), can’t go there cause the Americans will shoot you (Iraq)

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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... And across the line!

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Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

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On the Vauxhall Astra VXR No, listen, listen, listen, you won't be at the party if you drive one of these because you'll have torque-steered into a tree on the way. And you'd be killed, and that's important to die in an anecdote...your children will say "daddy died in a fireball in a Vauxhall and a tree!"

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

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This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

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LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

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"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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On the mclaren MP4-12C The first thing I would like to know is why they've named it after a fax machine.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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In Bolivia when a bridge had to be built Clarkson (firing up a chainsaw): I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE Hammond: He's got a chainsaw, hasn't he? Clarkson: OH YES! Hammond: Oh God.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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