I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

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... And across the line!

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

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Kia Rio "You may have seen The Fly II, in which a scientist attempts to teleport a dog. In one of the most gruesome scenes I’ve seen in a film it arrives at its destination completely inside out. Well the Rio is uglier than that. Inside, things get worse. "Small wonder Kia’s importer in Britain is sponsoring the Pedestrian Association’s Walking Bus scheme. The idea is that parents take it in turns to walk a group, or "bus", of children to their school in a morning. After three days of being transported in the Rio, my kids thought it was a brilliant idea to walk instead. Even though their school is 18 miles away and it was blowing a gale directly from the Canadian tundra."

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On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

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On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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It's like sitting on Dawn French!

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Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

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tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

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Announcing the Top Gear Awards in December 2005] “Now the best gas guzzler of the year. And the nominations are: the Range Rover Sport which achieved eight miles to the gallon; the Bugatti Veyron which achieved four miles to the gallon; and Hemel Hempstead. That actually used up 60 million gallons of fuel and didn’t move an inch.

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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Some Poos Come Out

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Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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The M3 CSL is going to be bought by the type of person who lies in bed at night thinking of his gearshift aggression strategy for his drive to work the next morning.

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Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

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I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

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great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

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I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

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The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled – usually when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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