- Clarksonisms

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POWER!!!!!!!!!!

This is a Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that’s much to shout about. That’s like saying ‘Oh good, I’ve got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases!'

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

Buying this car for its dynamic abilities, is like buying a porn film for its plot.

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

How many years are there in donkey years?

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

M3 drivers have no friends.

On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

Frederik Du lugter

It's like being tangled in a douvet on a hot night, I hate it!" Describibg one of the awful American pieces of tat on the good bad and the ugly dvd. Brilliant

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

Clarksonisms

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