On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

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The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

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I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

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Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

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It stands out like

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Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

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Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

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On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

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I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

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On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

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I was reading The Mirror the other day and came across a letter from a reader who wrote, 'I was riding my bike to work when this red Ferrari pulled up next to me. Out of the window, Jeremy Clarkson shouted 'Get a car', and drove off.' What I actually said was, 'Get a car you hatchet faced, leaf-eating N**i.

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Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

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Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

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The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

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POWER!!!!!!!!!!

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It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

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This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel “When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire. But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’ They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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