- Clarksonisms

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"How do I tell James to slow down?"

Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

[On the Jaguar S-Type Concept Car]: If that car comes out like that then I will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it

[Top Gear Awards]: Now it's time for the ugliest car of the year and the nominees... - actually there's no point is there, it's the Mini Clubman. That's the ugliest.

Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

[On the Citroen Berlingo]: "It's a very good car, so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail'

Hold on to your spleens everyone!

See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

Every year, the world's Golf GTI enthusiasts congregate in a field in Austria, and they talk about fuel injection and wear jumpers with "GTI" on them. Frankly I'd rather blow-torch my nipples off.

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

Clarksonisms

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