What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

[Top Gear Awards]: Now it's time for the ugliest car of the year and the nominees... - actually there's no point is there, it's the Mini Clubman. That's the ugliest.

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

The Caterham may only have 250bhp, but you have to remember that it weighs about the same... as a J-cloth.

The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

Motor from a food blender?

[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

Buying this car for its dynamic abilities, is like buying a porn film for its plot.

Volkswagen Jetta "I’d love to meet the man who styled the exterior, to find out if he’d done it as some sort of a joke. But mostly I’d like to meet the man who simply didn’t bother at all with the interior. Because looking at that dashboard gives you some idea of what it might be like to be dead."

Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

Supercars are supposed to run over Arthur Scargill, and then run over him again, for good measure. They're designed to melt ice-caps, kill the poor, poison the water table, destroy the ozone layer, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland Islands, and turn the entire Third World into a huge uninhabitable desert... but only after they've nicked all the world's oil.

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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