On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

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Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

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Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

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The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel “When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire. But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’ They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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On a Chevrolet Corvette "The Americans lecture the world on democracy and then won’t let me turn the traction control off!”

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Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

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This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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Das Stig is a manaic!

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"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

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On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

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Racing cars which have been converted for road use never really work. It’s like making a hardcore adult film, and then editing it so that it can be shown in British hotels. You’d just end up with a sort of half hour close up of some bloke’s sweaty face.

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Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

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Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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