Don't do that, tortoise!

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

Converting a racing car into a street car is like watching porn with all the good bits cut out... all you end up watching is a close up of some sweaty bloke bobbing his head for half an hour.

BMW 645Ci "If you were to buy a 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside."

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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