In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

As useful as a snooze alarm on a smoke detector

The air conditioning in Lambos used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

On the Alfa Romeo 8C "as Sir Francis Bacon once said, 'there is no beauty which hath not some strangeness about its proportions'. And he's right, who ever he is. I mean, look at keira Knightley. She's just an ironing board with a face. And she works."

Frederik Du lugter

Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

[In the P45]: "AH LORRY, LORRY, LORRY, LORRY! Oh a lot of poo SHOT out then!"

(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

Motorized pepper grinder?

These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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