On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

[On the Citroen Berlingo]: "It's a very good car, so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail'

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

Motor from a food blender?

On the mclaren MP4-12C The first thing I would like to know is why they've named it after a fax machine.

I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

[On Hammond's Dolomite Sprint] My washing machine moves around the kitchen faster than that!

Aston Martin Vanquish S "This is the last of the old-school Astons. It was built in the Newport Pagnell factory by men with body odour and hammers, rather than on the computer- controlled production line of the new Gaydon plant. And it shows. The car costs more than any other Aston yet is no quicker; its paddle shift gearbox is hilariously bad and its interior looks glued together from the Ford parts bin. It is the equivalent of opting for a rusty saw and leeches in the age of laser-guided brain surgery. Who is Aston kidding?

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

Just because something is unreliable doesn't mean it isn't great. Take, for example, Stephen Hawking. Great man, but most of him doesn't work.

Frederik Du lugter

Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

If you've got a better route map from the AA website, why don't you write to us at 'I asked the AA for a route to King's Lynn and now I'm on the International Space Station', Top Gear, London

Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

So you’re not buying a Bristol for the number of gizmos or the way those that you do get are attached to the car. I carefully examined the front air splitter, for instance, and deduced that it must have been put there by a horse. No, really. As Sherlock Holmes himself advised: “When you have eliminated the impossible” — and it is impossible to imagine a human making such a hash of it — “then what remains, no matter how implausible, must be the truth.” So it was a horse.


Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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