So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

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great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

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I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

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I'll tell you what, Richard. You go around our track on your Hayabusa at top speed and I'll chain smoke and we'll see who dies first.

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Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

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'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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How many years are there in donkey years?

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[On the Jaguar S-Type Concept Car]: If that car comes out like that then I will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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Das Stig is a manaic!

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I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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Assessing Hammond's crash: Clarkson: "you can see from the tape that the tyre is starting to come apart. Now why didn't you spot that?!" Hammond: "I had a lot on: I was doing 288 mph." Clarkson: "What do you mean you had a lot on? I can be in the office on the phone, doing the paperwork, kids are shouting at me, wife etc, but if a lion walks in, I'm going to notice it!"

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M3 drivers have no friends.

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Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

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Don't do that, tortoise!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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