- Clarksonisms

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

You know what's funny? The Joke below this one.

On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

It stands out like

"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

On the Porsche Cayenne: "Honestly, I have seen more attractive gangrenous wounds than this. It has the sex appeal of a camel with gingivitis.

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

... And across the line!

Yes, it's firm, but it's not uncomfortable. I mean compared to hanging from a bird's nest...by your fingernails...a million feet above some pointy boulders, for example.

It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

Clarksonisms

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