- Clarksonisms

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On the Chrysler Crossfire: "This is the worst thing that's come out of Germans and Americans working together since a fellow named Adolphus Busch arrived in America, tasted the water, and said "yeah, I could make beer out of this." And we were given that headache in a can - Budweiser."

While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

How many years are there in donkey years?

By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

"... And his miserable flat 6 is no match for this V8 tower of power!" Jeremy Clarkson on Audi R8 & Porsche Carrera 2

Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

herro am spoderman

Some Poos Come Out

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

Clarksonisms

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