Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

On the Citroën Berlingo: You can tell when a car firm is desperate to find things to say about their car, just look at the website: it has a laminated front windscreen, single front passenger seat, and manually adjustable door mirrors. So no electric mirrors, no alloy wheels. So it's a very good car so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail.

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

Frederik Du lugter

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

"I never really liked cars nor speed, so from this show and on forward, we are going to show you Japans top ten best poopie in the toilet cameras while we sit here and just fap!" *Audience laughs* "Yes, and we wont fap ourselves! In fact we will blow each other!" *audience gasps then applauds*

Hold on to your spleens everyone!

On the porsche GT2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that concludes my roadroad test of the GT2.

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz


Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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