On the Citroën Berlingo: You can tell when a car firm is desperate to find things to say about their car, just look at the website: it has a laminated front windscreen, single front passenger seat, and manually adjustable door mirrors. So no electric mirrors, no alloy wheels. So it's a very good car so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail.

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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