- Clarksonisms

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

Clarkson in a magazine, Take the Koala for instance, It spends half its life off its face on dope and the moment it gets scared it catches chlamydia

Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

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[In the P45]: "AH LORRY, LORRY, LORRY, LORRY! Oh a lot of poo SHOT out then!"

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

Clarksonisms

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