- Clarksonisms

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[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

Speed saves people!

'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

In the WOOORLD...

I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

This [Ferrari F60 Enzo] isn't just uncool, it's seriously uncool. Think of it this way, if you walk into the bathroom and see a man standing suspiciously close to the urinal, he probably owns one of them.

Every year, the world's Golf GTI enthusiasts congregate in a field in Austria, and they talk about fuel injection and wear jumpers with "GTI" on them. Frankly I'd rather blow-torch my nipples off.

"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

-On the Morgan Aero 8 Clarkson: You spent money on that? Hammond: Yeah. why not? Clarkson: Thats like saying 'Well, I've had marriage proposals from Angelina Jolie, Penelope Cruz, Natalie Portman, but no, I'm going to marry John McCrirrick'

While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

Clarksonisms

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