On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

It stands out like

On the TVR Tuscan 2 “You see, my wife loves this car. She loves the noise and the vibrations and the sense of danger and the way that when you over-rev it, the whole dash lights up like a baboon’s backside. Richard Hammond on the other hand, he pretty much hates it. He says it’s too difficult and too complicated and that all the stitching in here looks like the kind of stitching you find when someone’s tried to mend their own shoes.

How many years are there in donkey years?

BMW 645Ci "If you were to buy a 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside."

Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

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The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

[In the P45]: "AH LORRY, LORRY, LORRY, LORRY! Oh a lot of poo SHOT out then!"

On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

Speed is the solution to everything, not that I have ever done it, I mean I love speed but, not the other thing, the actual speed, the thing that makes you go really crazy and feel adrenaline curse trough you like hell! No not the stimulant, well actually... ...COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! (believe it or not, this is how he behaved when drunk 5 years ago, funny guy even when he is not trying to)

I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

During the color-mixing for the elderly-friendly Fiat (Multipla) Rover James: "So you can make any color we want? Can you do my left nipple?"

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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