Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

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We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

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The Caterham may only have 250bhp, but you have to remember that it weighs about the same... as a J-cloth.

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While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

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It's like sitting on Dawn French!

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I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

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Frederik Du lugter

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Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

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The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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Don't do that, tortoise!

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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