- Clarksonisms

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The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

On the McLaren P1: "And as you hurdle around in a puddle of your own feces, grinning like an infant, the car is working on ways to go even faster."

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

Motor from a food blender?

Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

Flying fish wasabi?

This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

On the Porsche Cayenne: "Honestly, I have seen more attractive gangrenous wounds than this. It has the sex appeal of a camel with gingivitis.

Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

Clarksonisms

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