In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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Deal with it

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On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

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It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

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On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

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Some sa that he's wanted by the CIA, and that he only eats cheese. All we know is... he's NOT the Stig, but he is Barack Obama... No wait, the Stig's AMERICAN COUSIN!

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

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This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

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on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

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When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

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[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

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It's like sitting on Dawn French!

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Frederik Du lugter

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Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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