- Clarksonisms

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

On the porsche GT2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that concludes my roadroad test of the GT2.

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

Some sa that he's wanted by the CIA, and that he only eats cheese. All we know is... he's NOT the Stig, but he is Barack Obama... No wait, the Stig's AMERICAN COUSIN!

This [Ferrari F60 Enzo] isn't just uncool, it's seriously uncool. Think of it this way, if you walk into the bathroom and see a man standing suspiciously close to the urinal, he probably owns one of them.

It's as reliable and long lasting as a pensioners erection.

Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

In the olden days, Ferrari used to build their racing cars with a lot of passion and enthusiasm. Then, on lap 3 as often as not, they would explode into a passionate and enthusiastic fireball. Since then, they've started building their racing cars with with science and math...

So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

How many years are there in donkey years?

Clarksonisms

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