I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

On the porsche GT2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that concludes my roadroad test of the GT2.

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

car goes fast

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

That's not an emergency, it's just time to... empty your bowels.

In the olden days, Ferrari used to build their racing cars with a lot of passion and enthusiasm. Then, on lap 3 as often as not, they would explode into a passionate and enthusiastic fireball. Since then, they've started building their racing cars with with science and math...

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

It's as reliable and long lasting as a pensioners erection.

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

Whatsapp Status

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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