(Referring to the Morris Marina) "The unpleasant log laid by British Leyland after communism crept like an itchy red blanket over the shop floor."

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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Frederik Du lugter

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What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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If you've got a better route map from the AA website, why don't you write to us at 'I asked the AA for a route to King's Lynn and now I'm on the International Space Station', Top Gear, London

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

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Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

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Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

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Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

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In the WOOORLD...

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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It's as reliable and long lasting as a pensioners erection.

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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Who ever said Leon Austin is a tramp.. He's not a tramp.. he's just a homeless person living on the streets. Me personally, i think they're different things.

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Best Driving Roads: Yep, ah, It’s unlikely to be here cause everyone does 5mph (N. America), it’s not going to be here cause everyone is on drugs (S. America), that’s just all full of Ox (Africa), Al Gore says that’s gone (Antarctica) so its not going to be down there, That’s just all Spiders (Australia), sign posts are all full of gibberish (Japan), They’re all communist (Kazakhstan/Russia), can’t go there cause the Americans will shoot you (Iraq)

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These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

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In Bolivia when a bridge had to be built Clarkson (firing up a chainsaw): I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE Hammond: He's got a chainsaw, hasn't he? Clarkson: OH YES! Hammond: Oh God.

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Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

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Buying this car for its dynamic abilities, is like buying a porn film for its plot.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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