what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

Frederik Du lugter

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

In the WOOORLD...

I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

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On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

Just because something is unreliable doesn't mean it isn't great. Take, for example, Stephen Hawking. Great man, but most of him doesn't work.

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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