I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

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This is the greatest car ... In the world

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Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

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It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

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This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

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Driving most supercars is like trying to manhandle a cow up a back staircase. . .this is like smearing honey into Keira Knightly. -driving the Audi R8

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Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

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While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

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"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

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Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

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Supercars are supposed to run over Arthur Scargill, and then run over him again, for good measure. They're designed to melt ice-caps, kill the poor, poison the water table, destroy the ozone layer, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland Islands, and turn the entire Third World into a huge uninhabitable desert... but only after they've nicked all the world's oil.

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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