Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

thumb_up thumb_down -630

Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

thumb_up thumb_down -4

On the Chrysler Crossfire: "This is the worst thing that's come out of Germans and Americans working together since a fellow named Adolphus Busch arrived in America, tasted the water, and said "yeah, I could make beer out of this." And we were given that headache in a can - Budweiser."

thumb_up thumb_down +81

On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

thumb_up thumb_down +212

The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Claire chris paul steve & dave

thumb_up thumb_down -23

[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

thumb_up thumb_down +18

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Deal with it

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

thumb_up thumb_down +141

The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Flying fish wasabi?

thumb_up thumb_down +107

That's not an emergency, it's just time to... empty your bowels.

thumb_up thumb_down +93

How hard can it be?

thumb_up thumb_down +250

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

thumb_up thumb_down -25

And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +93

Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

thumb_up thumb_down -56

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

[On the Jaguar S-Type Concept Car]: If that car comes out like that then I will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.