How hard can it be?

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

How many years are there in donkey years?

Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

car goes fast

Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Just because something is unreliable doesn't mean it isn't great. Take, for example, Stephen Hawking. Great man, but most of him doesn't work.

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

I’d rather go to work on my hands and knees than drive there in a Ford Galaxy. Whoever designed the Ford Galaxy upholstery had a cauliflower fixation. I would rather have a vasectomy than buy a Ford Galaxy.

This [Ferrari F60 Enzo] isn't just uncool, it's seriously uncool. Think of it this way, if you walk into the bathroom and see a man standing suspiciously close to the urinal, he probably owns one of them.

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

Converting a racing car into a street car is like watching porn with all the good bits cut out... all you end up watching is a close up of some sweaty bloke bobbing his head for half an hour.

"So having a twin turbo V12 diesel is like, turning your central heating off at home, and then keeping warm ... by burning Rembrandts." Audi Q7 V12 TDI

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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