On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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This is the new Maserati 4x4. It's called the Kubang, which being a Maserati, probably also the sound it'll make when the warranty expires.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

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I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

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The M3 CSL is going to be bought by the type of person who lies in bed at night thinking of his gearshift aggression strategy for his drive to work the next morning.

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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How hard can it be?

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I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

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James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

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(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

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If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

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What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

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On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

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"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

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Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

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POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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