I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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How many years are there in donkey years?

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"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

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[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

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This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

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The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

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[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

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On paddle shift automatic gearboxes “The thing is, it’s a gearbox, okay? It has one job to do! One job! Pull the lever… ‘Am I a pencil? Am I a cauliflower? Am I a nuclear power station – I’m a gearbox! Oh, heavens, I’m gonna swap some cogs around!’”

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Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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Hold on to your spleens everyone!

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People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

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great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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