How hard can it be?

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

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This is the new Maserati 4x4. It's called the Kubang, which being a Maserati, probably also the sound it'll make when the warranty expires.

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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Supercars are supposed to run over Arthur Scargill, and then run over him again, for good measure. They're designed to melt ice-caps, kill the poor, poison the water table, destroy the ozone layer, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland Islands, and turn the entire Third World into a huge uninhabitable desert... but only after they've nicked all the world's oil.

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

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Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

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Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

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Deal with it

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This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

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The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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