On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

On the TVR Tuscan 2 “It’s supposed to be easier to live with, and easier to drive... so has it worked? Ohh... Oh, my God. No... no... no, no, no. No. No. No, it hasn’t.”

The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

The Ferrari 355 is like a quail’s egg dipped in celery salt and served in Julia Roberts’ belly button.

Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

Illustrating the lack of power of a Boxster: "It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig's bottom.

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I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

On the Lotus Exige “To get an idea of just how spartan this thing is, you just have to look through the rear window. Back there you’ve got chicken wire, bacofoil and tupperware. It’s kind of like peering into one of your grannies’ old kitchen cabinets.”

Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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