On the Lotus Exige “To get an idea of just how spartan this thing is, you just have to look through the rear window. Back there you’ve got chicken wire, bacofoil and tupperware. It’s kind of like peering into one of your grannies’ old kitchen cabinets.”

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

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Claire chris paul steve & dave

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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It's like sitting on Dawn French!

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tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

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This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

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In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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[£100 car challenge] Hammond: I've managed to procure an x-ray of Jeremy's hand and it's 5 points off for a broken bone remember; look at the thumb, it's broken! Jeremy: It isn't Richard:It is, you broke your thumb! Jeremy: ...it's chipped.

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You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

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tonight, james wears jack sanders like a hat, richard wears jack sanders like a hat, and i wear jack sanders like a hat

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Who ever said Leon Austin is a tramp.. He's not a tramp.. he's just a homeless person living on the streets. Me personally, i think they're different things.

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Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.

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What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

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Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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