- Clarksonisms

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

Deal with it

This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

Clarkson in a magazine, Take the Koala for instance, It spends half its life off its face on dope and the moment it gets scared it catches chlamydia

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

Das Stig is a manaic!

Frederik Du lugter

Clarksonisms

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