On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

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Speed saves people!

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Deal with it

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On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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On the Citroën Berlingo: You can tell when a car firm is desperate to find things to say about their car, just look at the website: it has a laminated front windscreen, single front passenger seat, and manually adjustable door mirrors. So no electric mirrors, no alloy wheels. So it's a very good car so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail.

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Some Poos Come Out

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Claire chris paul steve & dave

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The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

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[On the Jaguar S-Type Concept Car]: If that car comes out like that then I will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it

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Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

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This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

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Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

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Why did the pharaoh go to Dairy Queen? He was thirsty

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The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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