- Clarksonisms

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

[Top Gear Awards]: Now it's time for the ugliest car of the year and the nominees... - actually there's no point is there, it's the Mini Clubman. That's the ugliest.

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

On the Alfa Romeo 8C "as Sir Francis Bacon once said, 'there is no beauty which hath not some strangeness about its proportions'. And he's right, who ever he is. I mean, look at keira Knightley. She's just an ironing board with a face. And she works."

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

-On the Morgan Aero 8 Clarkson: You spent money on that? Hammond: Yeah. why not? Clarkson: Thats like saying 'Well, I've had marriage proposals from Angelina Jolie, Penelope Cruz, Natalie Portman, but no, I'm going to marry John McCrirrick'

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

This is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying ‘Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases.'

On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

Clarksonisms

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