on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

On the Corvette Z06 “As something to live with every day, I’d rather have bird flu.”

Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

You know what's funny? The Joke below this one.

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

car goes fast

...In the world.

So you’re not buying a Bristol for the number of gizmos or the way those that you do get are attached to the car. I carefully examined the front air splitter, for instance, and deduced that it must have been put there by a horse. No, really. As Sherlock Holmes himself advised: “When you have eliminated the impossible” — and it is impossible to imagine a human making such a hash of it — “then what remains, no matter how implausible, must be the truth.” So it was a horse.

Claire chris paul steve & dave

Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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