It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

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On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

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And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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Deal with it

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That's not an emergency, it's just time to... empty your bowels.

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On the Mercedes CLS55 AMG “It sounds like Barry White eating wasps.”

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The Caterham may only have 250bhp, but you have to remember that it weighs about the same... as a J-cloth.

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Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

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[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

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Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

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Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

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What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

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I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

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Whatsapp Status

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I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

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It stands out like

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A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

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Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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