Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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Buying this car for its dynamic abilities, is like buying a porn film for its plot.

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A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

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Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

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I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

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I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

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I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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Deal with it

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Frederik Du lugter

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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Yes, it's firm, but it's not uncomfortable. I mean compared to hanging from a bird's nest...by your fingernails...a million feet above some pointy boulders, for example.

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What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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