Das Stig is a manaic!

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

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I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

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On the Vauxhall Astra VXR No, listen, listen, listen, you won't be at the party if you drive one of these because you'll have torque-steered into a tree on the way. And you'd be killed, and that's important to die in an anecdote...your children will say "daddy died in a fireball in a Vauxhall and a tree!"

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I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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Best Driving Roads: Yep, ah, It’s unlikely to be here cause everyone does 5mph (N. America), it’s not going to be here cause everyone is on drugs (S. America), that’s just all full of Ox (Africa), Al Gore says that’s gone (Antarctica) so its not going to be down there, That’s just all Spiders (Australia), sign posts are all full of gibberish (Japan), They’re all communist (Kazakhstan/Russia), can’t go there cause the Americans will shoot you (Iraq)

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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On the mclaren MP4-12C The first thing I would like to know is why they've named it after a fax machine.

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In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

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I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

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James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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