- Clarksonisms

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herro am spoderman

What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

The air conditioning in Lambos used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

(Referring to the Morris Marina) "The unpleasant log laid by British Leyland after communism crept like an itchy red blanket over the shop floor."

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

Who ever said Leon Austin is a tramp.. He's not a tramp.. he's just a homeless person living on the streets. Me personally, i think they're different things.

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

"I’m choosing the words for my conclusion with even more care than usual. So here goes. The 1-series is crap." BMW 1 Series

The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

[On the Jaguar S-Type Concept Car]: If that car comes out like that then I will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it

I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

Clarksonisms

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