When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

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ze5zege ef ege gg

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I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

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Hammond: "The premiums for 17 year old girls are around half what they are for 17 year old boys" Clarkson: "Well there's a Top Gear top tip right there! If you're a 17 year old and you need car insurance, slice your penis off."

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herro am spoderman

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Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

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What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

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If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

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Flying fish wasabi?

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The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

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It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

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...In the world.

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Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

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I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

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So you’re not buying a Bristol for the number of gizmos or the way those that you do get are attached to the car. I carefully examined the front air splitter, for instance, and deduced that it must have been put there by a horse. No, really. As Sherlock Holmes himself advised: “When you have eliminated the impossible” — and it is impossible to imagine a human making such a hash of it — “then what remains, no matter how implausible, must be the truth.” So it was a horse.

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These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

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What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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This is a Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that’s much to shout about. That’s like saying ‘Oh good, I’ve got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases!'

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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