This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

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'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

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On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

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People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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... And across the line!

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The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

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Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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Supercars are supposed to run over Arthur Scargill, and then run over him again, for good measure. They're designed to melt ice-caps, kill the poor, poison the water table, destroy the ozone layer, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland Islands, and turn the entire Third World into a huge uninhabitable desert... but only after they've nicked all the world's oil.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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car goes fast

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[£100 car challenge] Hammond: I've managed to procure an x-ray of Jeremy's hand and it's 5 points off for a broken bone remember; look at the thumb, it's broken! Jeremy: It isn't Richard:It is, you broke your thumb! Jeremy: ...it's chipped.

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It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

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Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

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There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

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Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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