This is the greatest car ... In the world

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Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

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This is the new Maserati 4x4. It's called the Kubang, which being a Maserati, probably also the sound it'll make when the warranty expires.

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Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

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Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

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Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

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I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

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Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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... And across the line!

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Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

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Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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