Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

On the TVR Tuscan 2 “You see, my wife loves this car. She loves the noise and the vibrations and the sense of danger and the way that when you over-rev it, the whole dash lights up like a baboon’s backside. Richard Hammond on the other hand, he pretty much hates it. He says it’s too difficult and too complicated and that all the stitching in here looks like the kind of stitching you find when someone’s tried to mend their own shoes.

Perodua Kelisa 1.0 GXi "This is without doubt the worst car, not just in its category but in the world. It has a top speed of 88mph but takes so long to reach it that no one has ever lived long enough to verify the claim, the inside is tackier than Anthea Turner’s wedding and you don’t want to think what would happen if it bumped into a lamppost. "Also its name sounds like a disease."

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

Claire chris paul steve & dave

Biathletes need to eat 6,000 calories a day: six thousand! That’s the equivalent of two pounds of butter, 70 slices of bread, 112 eggs, 86 tabs of yogurts, 28 potatoes, 117 biscuits and 21 Twix bars. On that basis, I could be an Olympic biathlete!

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

As useful as a snooze alarm on a smoke detector

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On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

The highlight of my childhood – it’s the Ladybird Book of Motorcars from 1963, and as you would imagine it’s full of rubbish really. Just endless boring grey shapes, until you get to page 40, where you find the Maserati 3500 GT. Now this for me, when I was little, was kind of like Jordan and Cameron Diaz. In a bath together. With a Lightning jet fighter. And lots of jelly.

It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

How many years are there in donkey years?

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

Flying fish wasabi?

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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