"So having a twin turbo V12 diesel is like, turning your central heating off at home, and then keeping warm ... by burning Rembrandts." Audi Q7 V12 TDI

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

Yes, it's firm, but it's not uncomfortable. I mean compared to hanging from a bird's nest...by your fingernails...a million feet above some pointy boulders, for example.

If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

On Detroit “God may have created the world in six days, but while he was resting on the seventh, Beelzebub popped up and did this place."

'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

tonight, james wears jack sanders like a hat, richard wears jack sanders like a hat, and i wear jack sanders like a hat

On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

"Aston Martin DB9. That's not really a racing car, that's just pornography."

This is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying ‘Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases.'

I’d rather go to work on my hands and knees than drive there in a Ford Galaxy. Whoever designed the Ford Galaxy upholstery had a cauliflower fixation. I would rather have a vasectomy than buy a Ford Galaxy.

Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

In the WOOORLD...

On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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