- Clarksonisms

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

"So having a twin turbo V12 diesel is like, turning your central heating off at home, and then keeping warm ... by burning Rembrandts." Audi Q7 V12 TDI

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

Buying this car for its dynamic abilities, is like buying a porn film for its plot.

Some Poos Come Out

"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

M3 drivers have no friends.

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

On the Mercedes CLS55 AMG “It sounds like Barry White eating wasps.”

A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

Racing cars which have been converted for road use never really work. It’s like making a hardcore adult film, and then editing it so that it can be shown in British hotels. You’d just end up with a sort of half hour close up of some bloke’s sweaty face.

The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

Some sa that he's wanted by the CIA, and that he only eats cheese. All we know is... he's NOT the Stig, but he is Barack Obama... No wait, the Stig's AMERICAN COUSIN!

It's as reliable and long lasting as a pensioners erection.

Clarksonisms

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