... And across the line!

The M3 CSL is going to be bought by the type of person who lies in bed at night thinking of his gearshift aggression strategy for his drive to work the next morning.

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

Clarkson on Chrysler Crossfire- I have been trying to think -what it is that this shape reminds me of and last night it came to me- you know when a dog....doing its....aahh...number II, that kind of arched back thing .....thats what it is(with hand gestures and disgusted expression).....HIDEOUS!.....EWWWW!!

Some Poos Come Out

Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

The Ferrari 355 is like a quail’s egg dipped in celery salt and served in Julia Roberts’ belly button.

Speed saves people!

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

On a Chevrolet Corvette "The Americans lecture the world on democracy and then won’t let me turn the traction control off!”

"I’m choosing the words for my conclusion with even more care than usual. So here goes. The 1-series is crap." BMW 1 Series

You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have a camp fire, you have to park within two feet of a post, you have to keep quiet, you have to be in bed by eleven. This is not a holiday, it's a concentration camp!

I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

When describing the Mazda Demio-"Yes I know it'll take you to the shops, but then so will a pogo stick!

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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