'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

On James May: "He also hasn't got a penis cause it came off once."

[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

Motorized pepper grinder?

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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On the Enzo Ferrari “Ferrari is so pleased with it they’ve named it after the founder of the company. They call it the Enzo. That’d be the same as Lotus calling their next car... ‘The Colin.’”

You cannot have this car with a diesel. It's like saying, I won't go to Stringfellows tonight, I'll get my mum to give me a lap dance, she's a woman!

On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have a camp fire, you have to park within two feet of a post, you have to keep quiet, you have to be in bed by eleven. This is not a holiday, it's a concentration camp!

When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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