A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

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Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

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You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have a camp fire, you have to park within two feet of a post, you have to keep quiet, you have to be in bed by eleven. This is not a holiday, it's a concentration camp!

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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I’d rather go to work on my hands and knees than drive there in a Ford Galaxy. Whoever designed the Ford Galaxy upholstery had a cauliflower fixation. I would rather have a vasectomy than buy a Ford Galaxy.

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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This is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying ‘Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases.'

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Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

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I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

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Announcing the Top Gear Awards in December 2005] “Now the best gas guzzler of the year. And the nominations are: the Range Rover Sport which achieved eight miles to the gallon; the Bugatti Veyron which achieved four miles to the gallon; and Hemel Hempstead. That actually used up 60 million gallons of fuel and didn’t move an inch.

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On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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The highlight of my childhood – it’s the Ladybird Book of Motorcars from 1963, and as you would imagine it’s full of rubbish really. Just endless boring grey shapes, until you get to page 40, where you find the Maserati 3500 GT. Now this for me, when I was little, was kind of like Jordan and Cameron Diaz. In a bath together. With a Lightning jet fighter. And lots of jelly.

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The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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Motor from a food blender?

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On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

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On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

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"Aston Martin DB9. That's not really a racing car, that's just pornography."

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On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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On the Alfa Romeo Brera “Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you?”

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Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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