Speed is the solution to everything, not that I have ever done it, I mean I love speed but, not the other thing, the actual speed, the thing that makes you go really crazy and feel adrenaline curse trough you like hell! No not the stimulant, well actually... ...COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! (believe it or not, this is how he behaved when drunk 5 years ago, funny guy even when he is not trying to)

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

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Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

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On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

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The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

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Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

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This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

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The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

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By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

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You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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... And across the line!

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Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

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Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

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"How do I tell James to slow down?"

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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