- Clarksonisms

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

This is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying ‘Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases.'

Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

Motor from a food blender?

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

On the mclaren MP4-12C The first thing I would like to know is why they've named it after a fax machine.

POWER!!!!!!!!!!

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

M3 drivers have no friends.

Clarksonisms

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