A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

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On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

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On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

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It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

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On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

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On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

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[On Hammond's Dolomite Sprint] My washing machine moves around the kitchen faster than that!

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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On the BMW X5 M There's a gallon of fuel gone there, and another there...and yet another there. As a matter of fact, the only way this car could be less annoying to eco-mentalists is if its engine ran on sliced dolphin.

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Deal with it

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I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

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What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

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... And across the line!

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

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On the Mercedes CLS55: Braking in this car is so brutal, it would be less painful to actually hit the tree you were trying to miss.

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[In the P45]: "AH LORRY, LORRY, LORRY, LORRY! Oh a lot of poo SHOT out then!"

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we wait with anticipation

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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