- Clarksonisms

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

Some Poos Come Out

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Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

Hammond: "The premiums for 17 year old girls are around half what they are for 17 year old boys" Clarkson: "Well there's a Top Gear top tip right there! If you're a 17 year old and you need car insurance, slice your penis off."

Clarkson in a magazine, Take the Koala for instance, It spends half its life off its face on dope and the moment it gets scared it catches chlamydia

(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

Just because something is unreliable doesn't mean it isn't great. Take, for example, Stephen Hawking. Great man, but most of him doesn't work.

[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

This is a Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that’s much to shout about. That’s like saying ‘Oh good, I’ve got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases!'

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

Clarksonisms

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