On the Renault Clio V6 “I think the problem is that it’s French. It’s a surrendermonkey.”

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On the Alfa Romeo 8C "as Sir Francis Bacon once said, 'there is no beauty which hath not some strangeness about its proportions'. And he's right, who ever he is. I mean, look at keira Knightley. She's just an ironing board with a face. And she works."

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I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

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On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

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On the BMW X5 M There's a gallon of fuel gone there, and another there...and yet another there. As a matter of fact, the only way this car could be less annoying to eco-mentalists is if its engine ran on sliced dolphin.

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Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

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Whatsapp Status

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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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Claire chris paul steve & dave

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I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

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I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

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In Bolivia when a bridge had to be built Clarkson (firing up a chainsaw): I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE Hammond: He's got a chainsaw, hasn't he? Clarkson: OH YES! Hammond: Oh God.

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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This is the new Maserati 4x4. It's called the Kubang, which being a Maserati, probably also the sound it'll make when the warranty expires.

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What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

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It's as reliable and long lasting as a pensioners erection.

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See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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