- Clarksonisms

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

On the Lotus Exige “To get an idea of just how spartan this thing is, you just have to look through the rear window. Back there you’ve got chicken wire, bacofoil and tupperware. It’s kind of like peering into one of your grannies’ old kitchen cabinets.”

You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

[Stretch Limos Challenge] - ... for some extraodinary reason the rules say you can't drive a 46-foot car on the public highway, so I had to do some surgery...

On the McLaren P1: "And as you hurdle around in a puddle of your own feces, grinning like an infant, the car is working on ways to go even faster."

James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

Some Poos Come Out

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

Clarksonisms

Our Updated iOS App!