- Clarksonisms

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It's as reliable and long lasting as a pensioners erection.

Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

M3 drivers have no friends.

[Stretch Limos Challenge] - ... for some extraodinary reason the rules say you can't drive a 46-foot car on the public highway, so I had to do some surgery...

Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

How hard can it be?

Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

Flying fish wasabi?

This is winnie the pooh with road rage

If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

tonight, james wears jack sanders like a hat, richard wears jack sanders like a hat, and i wear jack sanders like a hat

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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car goes fast

See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

Clarksonisms

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