- Clarksonisms

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On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

This is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying ‘Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases.'

Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

Bentley, Feawr Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, In Bentley No One Can Hear You Scream (In American Movie Trailer Voice)

Now, what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine, but a little field mouse named Gerald, and considering its price, your better off literally eating seventeen and a half thousand pounds. Of gravel. -Jezza on the ford focus se

On the Enzo Ferrari “Ferrari is so pleased with it they’ve named it after the founder of the company. They call it the Enzo. That’d be the same as Lotus calling their next car... ‘The Colin.’”

Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

On the Mercedes CLS55: Braking in this car is so brutal, it would be less painful to actually hit the tree you were trying to miss.

POWER!!!!!!!!!!

Clarksonisms

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