This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

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Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

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Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

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On the McLaren P1: "And as you hurdle around in a puddle of your own feces, grinning like an infant, the car is working on ways to go even faster."

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car goes fast

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If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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"How do I tell James to slow down?"

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I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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On the Porsche Cayenne: "Honestly, I have seen more attractive gangrenous wounds than this. It has the sex appeal of a camel with gingivitis.

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Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

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When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel “When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire. But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’ They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.

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This is a Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that’s much to shout about. That’s like saying ‘Oh good, I’ve got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases!'

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

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Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

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Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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