What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

herro am spoderman

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

This is winnie the pooh with road rage

That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

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