Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled – usually when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was.

When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel “When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire. But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’ They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

It's like being tangled in a douvet on a hot night, I hate it!" Describibg one of the awful American pieces of tat on the good bad and the ugly dvd. Brilliant

You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

Every year, the world's Golf GTI enthusiasts congregate in a field in Austria, and they talk about fuel injection and wear jumpers with "GTI" on them. Frankly I'd rather blow-torch my nipples off.

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

When describing the Mazda Demio-"Yes I know it'll take you to the shops, but then so will a pogo stick!

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

Deal with it

On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.