- Clarksonisms

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And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

In the olden days, Ferrari used to build their racing cars with a lot of passion and enthusiasm. Then, on lap 3 as often as not, they would explode into a passionate and enthusiastic fireball. Since then, they've started building their racing cars with with science and math...

POWER!!!!!!!!!!

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

How many years are there in donkey years?

[£100 car challenge] Hammond: I've managed to procure an x-ray of Jeremy's hand and it's 5 points off for a broken bone remember; look at the thumb, it's broken! Jeremy: It isn't Richard:It is, you broke your thumb! Jeremy: ...it's chipped.

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

on Ferrari F430: "the basic price is about 118,000 pound, which is not really bad. I mean, sell the house, sell the children for medical experiment, rob a bank, and you will soon get that money"

It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

Why did the pharaoh go to Dairy Queen? He was thirsty

The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

Yes, it's firm, but it's not uncomfortable. I mean compared to hanging from a bird's nest...by your fingernails...a million feet above some pointy boulders, for example.

Clarksonisms

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