The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

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On the Mercedes CLS55 AMG “It sounds like Barry White eating wasps.”

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And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

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on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

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I don't know why we became clarksonisms, Think your fancy HUH.

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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"So having a twin turbo V12 diesel is like, turning your central heating off at home, and then keeping warm ... by burning Rembrandts." Audi Q7 V12 TDI

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I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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It's like sitting on Dawn French!

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Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

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Hold on to your spleens everyone!

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Speed is the solution to everything, not that I have ever done it, I mean I love speed but, not the other thing, the actual speed, the thing that makes you go really crazy and feel adrenaline curse trough you like hell! No not the stimulant, well actually... ...COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! (believe it or not, this is how he behaved when drunk 5 years ago, funny guy even when he is not trying to)

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It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

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Just because something is unreliable doesn't mean it isn't great. Take, for example, Stephen Hawking. Great man, but most of him doesn't work.

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That's not an emergency, it's just time to... empty your bowels.

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

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I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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