While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

Flying fish wasabi?

It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

M3 drivers have no friends.

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

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A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

While driving through a rural part of India: "MONKEEEEEEEEEEEY!!!! MONKEY MONKEY.... with MASSIVE testicles!!!!"

"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

I WONDER WHAT HAPPEN’S WHEN DOCTOR’S WIFE EATS AN APPLE A DAY. Source: Pingzic collection of WhatsApp Status

most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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