I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

[Stretch Limos Challenge] - ... for some extraodinary reason the rules say you can't drive a 46-foot car on the public highway, so I had to do some surgery...

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

In the WOOORLD...

On the Renault Clio V6 “I think the problem is that it’s French. It’s a surrendermonkey.”

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

Why did the pharaoh go to Dairy Queen? He was thirsty

'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

On the Porsche Cayenne: "Honestly, I have seen more attractive gangrenous wounds than this. It has the sex appeal of a camel with gingivitis.

Motor from a food blender?

Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

It costs Volkswagen £200 pounds to buy a set of four fuel injectors for the Golf diesel. Kia could probably make a couple of cars for that.

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

Racing cars which have been converted for road use never really work. It’s like making a hardcore adult film, and then editing it so that it can be shown in British hotels. You’d just end up with a sort of half hour close up of some bloke’s sweaty face.

Old jags are like living inside James May but this one is like living inside James Kirk

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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