Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

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I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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car goes fast

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I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time.

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

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By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

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Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

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Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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Deal with it

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This is what scares me. It's called the Trojan and because it's part tank, part bulldozer, it's the king of...wherever it damn well wants to go.

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On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

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On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

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LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

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What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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