"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

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Clarkson watching someone drive a lada and being offered to ride one. "Its are raping him! And then its going to rape me!... OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!

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Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

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The Ferrari 355 is like a quail’s egg dipped in celery salt and served in Julia Roberts’ belly button.

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I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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[On the Citroen Berlingo]: "It's a very good car, so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail'

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The Caterham may only have 250bhp, but you have to remember that it weighs about the same... as a J-cloth.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

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...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

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herro am spoderman

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You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have a camp fire, you have to park within two feet of a post, you have to keep quiet, you have to be in bed by eleven. This is not a holiday, it's a concentration camp!

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When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

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I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

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What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

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The air conditioning in Lambos used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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