And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

ze5zege ef ege gg

This is winnie the pooh with road rage

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

"I never really liked cars nor speed, so from this show and on forward, we are going to show you Japans top ten best poopie in the toilet cameras while we sit here and just fap!" *Audience laughs* "Yes, and we wont fap ourselves! In fact we will blow each other!" *audience gasps then applauds*

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning and you think you are an onion, this is your car.

Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

Das Stig is a manaic!

[£100 car challenge] Hammond: I've managed to procure an x-ray of Jeremy's hand and it's 5 points off for a broken bone remember; look at the thumb, it's broken! Jeremy: It isn't Richard:It is, you broke your thumb! Jeremy: ...it's chipped.

And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.