Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

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This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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Flying fish wasabi?

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Hold on to your spleens everyone!

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Deal with it

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Motor from a food blender?

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On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

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POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

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In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

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What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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Clarkson in a magazine, Take the Koala for instance, It spends half its life off its face on dope and the moment it gets scared it catches chlamydia

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

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poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

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When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

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[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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ze5zege ef ege gg

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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