Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

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Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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we wait with anticipation

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Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

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It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

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Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

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this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

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car goes fast

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What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

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M3 drivers have no friends.

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The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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During the color-mixing for the elderly-friendly Fiat (Multipla) Rover James: "So you can make any color we want? Can you do my left nipple?"

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Why did the pharaoh go to Dairy Queen? He was thirsty

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So you’re not buying a Bristol for the number of gizmos or the way those that you do get are attached to the car. I carefully examined the front air splitter, for instance, and deduced that it must have been put there by a horse. No, really. As Sherlock Holmes himself advised: “When you have eliminated the impossible” — and it is impossible to imagine a human making such a hash of it — “then what remains, no matter how implausible, must be the truth.” So it was a horse.

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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In the WOOORLD...

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Some Poos Come Out

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... And across the line!

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Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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