- Clarksonisms

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It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

On the Chrysler Crossfire: "This is the worst thing that's come out of Germans and Americans working together since a fellow named Adolphus Busch arrived in America, tasted the water, and said "yeah, I could make beer out of this." And we were given that headache in a can - Budweiser."

Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

On the TVR Tuscan 2 “It’s supposed to be easier to live with, and easier to drive... so has it worked? Ohh... Oh, my God. No... no... no, no, no. No. No. No, it hasn’t.”

Clarksonisms

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