- Clarksonisms

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

Some Poos Come Out

Speed saves people!

Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

This is the new Maserati 4x4. It's called the Kubang, which being a Maserati, probably also the sound it'll make when the warranty expires.

While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

A Hummer; You need 280574965897831756791492756237859087683472390645839057644382457684385739248759320842013878742178347658375843921764 gallons of gas to get out of the garage.

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

"How do I tell James to slow down?"

"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

In the olden days, Ferrari used to build their racing cars with a lot of passion and enthusiasm. Then, on lap 3 as often as not, they would explode into a passionate and enthusiastic fireball. Since then, they've started building their racing cars with with science and math...

It stands out like

'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

Whatsapp Status

It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

Clarksonisms

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