Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

Killing a mamooth

This is winnie the pooh with road rage

On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

"... And his miserable flat 6 is no match for this V8 tower of power!" Jeremy Clarkson on Audi R8 & Porsche Carrera 2

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

Hold on to your spleens everyone!

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

Motorized pepper grinder?

The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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