- Clarksonisms

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During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

Speed saves people!

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

James: I'm curious, Jeremy, what is it that you don't get about bikes? Jeremy: I just don't want to have to dress up like a Power Ranger to go down to the pub and drink orange juice all afternoon.

Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

On the Ford GT40 “Was this the greatest hypercar of them all? Well, that’s a question I’ve never really been able to answer, because the GT40 is 40 inches tall... and I'm not.”

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

On the Corvette Z06 “As something to live with every day, I’d rather have bird flu.”

Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze.

While playing the video game Gran Turismo "Aston Martin DB9 – that’s not a racecar, that’s pornography."

On the TVR Tuscan 2 “It’s supposed to be easier to live with, and easier to drive... so has it worked? Ohh... Oh, my God. No... no... no, no, no. No. No. No, it hasn’t.”

On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

Clarksonisms

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