If you've got a better route map from the AA website, why don't you write to us at 'I asked the AA for a route to King's Lynn and now I'm on the International Space Station', Top Gear, London

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On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

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When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pu-sy? (...) Pu-sy, energy drink"

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When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

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I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

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herro am spoderman

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On A Lincoln Towncar. I can see him at home with his wife now. Dammit Myrdle! I can't figger out a way to make this wheel square! I got me square dials, I got me a square dash, I got me a square body. But the wheel! it's circular! Ruins the whole KAWR!

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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We'll try it my way first, and then we'll finish it.

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On the Enzo Ferrari “Ferrari is so pleased with it they’ve named it after the founder of the company. They call it the Enzo. That’d be the same as Lotus calling their next car... ‘The Colin.’”

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Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

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What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

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On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

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Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer.

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano "There, right in the middle of everything, is a quartic steering wheel. Yup, quartic, as in square, as in Austin Allegro. And worse still, it’s half carbon fibre and half leather, and it’s got all sorts of Formula One-style buttons on the bottom and then, along the top, a series of red lights that come on to tell you when to change gear. Unfortunately they are so bright you think you’ve been caught in the fearsome glare from a Martian spaceship. "So you don’t change gear. You crash."

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the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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car goes fast

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(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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