On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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BMW 645Ci "If you were to buy a 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside."

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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There are signs directing you away from Birmingham but nothing enticing you in.

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

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3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

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Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

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See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

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I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

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on Ferrari F430: "the basic price is about 118,000 pound, which is not really bad. I mean, sell the house, sell the children for medical experiment, rob a bank, and you will soon get that money"

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On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

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I’d rather go to work on my hands and knees than drive there in a Ford Galaxy. Whoever designed the Ford Galaxy upholstery had a cauliflower fixation. I would rather have a vasectomy than buy a Ford Galaxy.

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Aston Martin Vanquish S "This is the last of the old-school Astons. It was built in the Newport Pagnell factory by men with body odour and hammers, rather than on the computer- controlled production line of the new Gaydon plant. And it shows. The car costs more than any other Aston yet is no quicker; its paddle shift gearbox is hilariously bad and its interior looks glued together from the Ford parts bin. It is the equivalent of opting for a rusty saw and leeches in the age of laser-guided brain surgery. Who is Aston kidding?

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Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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