- Clarksonisms

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

In Bolivia when a bridge had to be built Clarkson (firing up a chainsaw): I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE Hammond: He's got a chainsaw, hasn't he? Clarkson: OH YES! Hammond: Oh God.

On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

What did the Morris Marina compete against? Walking? The bus?

car goes fast

This is a Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that’s much to shout about. That’s like saying ‘Oh good, I’ve got syphilis, the best of the sexually transmitted diseases!'

Buying this car for its dynamic abilities, is like buying a porn film for its plot.

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

On the Mercedes CLS55: Braking in this car is so brutal, it would be less painful to actually hit the tree you were trying to miss.

On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

Tonight, the new Viper, which is the American equivalent of a sports car... in the same way, I guess, that George Bush is the equivalent of a President.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

Speed never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you.

Clarksonisms

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