Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

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Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

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On the Porsche Cayenne: "Honestly, I have seen more attractive gangrenous wounds than this. It has the sex appeal of a camel with gingivitis.

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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And, it's made in Britain! Which is another way of saying the door is going to fall off.

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On the Vauxhall vectra: it's a cure for ADD, any child with would fall asleep in 3 minutes flat

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(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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I don't like being overtaken. It's a sign of weakness.

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Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

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The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

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[Top Gear Awards]: Now it's time for the ugliest car of the year and the nominees... - actually there's no point is there, it's the Mini Clubman. That's the ugliest.

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Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

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The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Speed saves people!

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On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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