- Clarksonisms

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

Hold on to your spleens everyone!

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

How many years are there in donkey years?

[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

The M3 CSL is going to be bought by the type of person who lies in bed at night thinking of his gearshift aggression strategy for his drive to work the next morning.

Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

"... And his miserable flat 6 is no match for this V8 tower of power!" Jeremy Clarkson on Audi R8 & Porsche Carrera 2

ze5zege ef ege gg

I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

As useful as a snooze alarm on a smoke detector

On the Enzo Ferrari “Ferrari is so pleased with it they’ve named it after the founder of the company. They call it the Enzo. That’d be the same as Lotus calling their next car... ‘The Colin.’”

On the Alfa Romeo Brera “Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you?”

The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw.

There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

Motorized pepper grinder?

Biathletes need to eat 6,000 calories a day: six thousand! That’s the equivalent of two pounds of butter, 70 slices of bread, 112 eggs, 86 tabs of yogurts, 28 potatoes, 117 biscuits and 21 Twix bars. On that basis, I could be an Olympic biathlete!

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

"Only the americans would invent a car polish you can eat."

M3 drivers have no friends.

Clarksonisms

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