[On the Citroen Berlingo]: "It's a very good car, so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail'

It's like sitting on Dawn French!

great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

As useful as a snooze alarm on a smoke detector

On the Koenigsegg CCX “I think Koenigsegg is Swedish for: Oh no, my head has just exploded!”

What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

Motorized pepper grinder?

There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

car goes fast

It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

Claire chris paul steve & dave

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

There are signs directing you away from Birmingham but nothing enticing you in.

On James May: "He also hasn't got a penis cause it came off once."

You cannot have this car with a diesel. It's like saying, I won't go to Stringfellows tonight, I'll get my mum to give me a lap dance, she's a woman!

This is the Renault Espace, probably the best of the people carriers. Not that that's much to shout about. That's like saying ‘Ooh good I've got syphilis, the BEST of the sexually transmitted diseases.'

On a Chevrolet Corvette "The Americans lecture the world on democracy and then won’t let me turn the traction control off!”

On the porsche GT2: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that concludes my roadroad test of the GT2.

I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

When discussing the suspension adjustability on the Bentley Continental GT. "It really is about as useful as having a snooze button on a smoke alarm".

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.