And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

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[On the Jaguar S-Type Concept Car]: If that car comes out like that then I will cut my left leg off and beat myself to death with it

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Das Stig is a manaic!

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Could you really get children to work in a factory? Becouse that would be brilliant!

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we wait with anticipation

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People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

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Jeremy on their challenge when James was gonna be piloting a plane: "So it'll be Captain Captain Slow and his Hammond hand luggage!"

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Claire chris paul steve & dave

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Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Don't do that, tortoise!

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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Frederik Du lugter

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Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

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Some sa that he's wanted by the CIA, and that he only eats cheese. All we know is... he's NOT the Stig, but he is Barack Obama... No wait, the Stig's AMERICAN COUSIN!

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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[Top Gear Awards]: Now it's time for the ugliest car of the year and the nominees... - actually there's no point is there, it's the Mini Clubman. That's the ugliest.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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