the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

thumb_up thumb_down -117

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Flying fish wasabi?

thumb_up thumb_down +97

Clarkson on Chrysler Crossfire- I have been trying to think -what it is that this shape reminds me of and last night it came to me- you know when a dog....doing its....aahh...number II, that kind of arched back thing .....thats what it is(with hand gestures and disgusted expression).....HIDEOUS!.....EWWWW!!

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Land Rover Defender 90 Td5 Station Wagon "Often fourth isn’t enough to get you up a hill, so you drop down to third and it feels as though you’ve been hit in the back with a wrecking ball. All of a sudden you’re doing 35mph but your eight-ton suit of armour, making a noise that sounds like the birth of the universe, has come to an almost dead stop. "What’s more, there still isn’t enough room behind the wheel for anyone with shoulders or legs, there are still sharp edges, it’s as bouncy as a small dog at suppertime, and as a result it’s about as much fun to drive as a punctured wheelbarrow. And it’s not like the misery is short-lived, because each trip to the shops can, and does, take two or three weeks."

thumb_up thumb_down +125

On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

thumb_up thumb_down +84

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +523

On the Vauxhall Vectra VXR: "there is a word to describe this car. It begins with 's' and ends with ‘t' and it isn't soot."

thumb_up thumb_down +97

The Caterham may only have 250bhp, but you have to remember that it weighs about the same... as a J-cloth.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Perodua Kelisa 1.0 GXi "This is without doubt the worst car, not just in its category but in the world. It has a top speed of 88mph but takes so long to reach it that no one has ever lived long enough to verify the claim, the inside is tackier than Anthea Turner’s wedding and you don’t want to think what would happen if it bumped into a lamppost. "Also its name sounds like a disease."

thumb_up thumb_down +187

When it comes to getting 100,000 twitter followers, Ladsta is your best bet. For only 49.99, you can get 100,000 followers sent to your twitter account.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +118

poopoopoopoopoopoopoop

thumb_up thumb_down -41

On the Porsche Cayenne “I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Yes, it's firm, but it's not uncomfortable. I mean compared to hanging from a bird's nest...by your fingernails...a million feet above some pointy boulders, for example.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Some Poos Come Out

thumb_up thumb_down +58

[On Hammond's Dolomite Sprint] My washing machine moves around the kitchen faster than that!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I'll tell you what, Richard. You go around our track on your Hayabusa at top speed and I'll chain smoke and we'll see who dies first.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.