- Clarksonisms

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In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled – usually when one of their customers wrote to the factory complaining about how dead he was.

Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

The last time someone was as wrong as you, was when a politician stepped off an aeroplane in 1939 waving a piece of paper in the air saying there will be no war with Germany.

On the Porsche Boxster “It couldn't pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.

On paddle shift automatic gearboxes “The thing is, it’s a gearbox, okay? It has one job to do! One job! Pull the lever… ‘Am I a pencil? Am I a cauliflower? Am I a nuclear power station – I’m a gearbox! Oh, heavens, I’m gonna swap some cogs around!’”

Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

The Ferrari 355 is like a quail’s egg dipped in celery salt and served in Julia Roberts’ belly button.

Cars cars cars.... heh. Written by: pirater un compte facebook

on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

Britain's nuclear submarines have been deemed unsafe... probably because they don't have wheel-chair access.

A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

ze5zege ef ege gg

[Stretch Limos Challenge] - ... for some extraodinary reason the rules say you can't drive a 46-foot car on the public highway, so I had to do some surgery...

Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

A turbo: exhaust gasses go into the turbocharger and spin it, witchcraft happens and you go faster.

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

Clarksonisms

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