The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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...In the world.

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In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

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In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

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on Ferrari F430: "the basic price is about 118,000 pound, which is not really bad. I mean, sell the house, sell the children for medical experiment, rob a bank, and you will soon get that money"

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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Can you ever love a machine? Of course you can. John Connor did. And I love the LFA.

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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While discussing The Stig's tube leg of the race, on foot through london, "....or stig could be mistaken for a Brazillian plumber". Not very PC but very apt - and you are left in no doubt on his thoughts on the subject.

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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Some Poos Come Out

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LOTUS - Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious.

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Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

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I'll tell you what. We'll try it my way first... and then we'll finish.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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"Still, if you want one [X5 M], get your nurse to find you a crayon and write out a check for seventy six thousand pounds...or if you don't understand how crayons work, you could spend even more on this rather ugly Audi."

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most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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