- Clarksonisms

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

On the Corvette Z06 “As something to live with every day, I’d rather have bird flu.”

What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

The only person to ever look good in the back of a 4-seater convertible was Adolf Hitler.

Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

On the Enzo Ferrari "I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing."

Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

On Segways "They’re made in America, of course, so fat Yanks can go to the fridge without expending any energy."

So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

BMW 645Ci "If you were to buy a 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside."

What's worse than the holocaust? 6 million Jews.

(Referring to the Morris Marina) "The unpleasant log laid by British Leyland after communism crept like an itchy red blanket over the shop floor."

The old Aston Martin DB7 was just a Jag in drag. It was an XJ-S in a party frock. This (the Aston-Martin DB-9) is completely different.

Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

The back of the BMW 6 series... it looks like a tramp's hat!

On the Mercedes CLS55 AMG “It sounds like Barry White eating wasps.”

When you reach he limits of grip, the Jaguar XJ220 demands a special technique. You put your foot on the clutch, and repeat after me: Our Father, who art in heaven, I'll be there in a minute.

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

On Detroit “God may have created the world in six days, but while he was resting on the seventh, Beelzebub popped up and did this place."

great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

Clarksonisms

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