- Clarksonisms

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On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

This is the thing you have to remember, Alfa build a car to be as good as a car can be... briefly.

On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

3 nominations on that award and David Coulthard finished 4th.

Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

When describing the Mazda Demio-"Yes I know it'll take you to the shops, but then so will a pogo stick!

On the TVR Tuscan 2 “It’s supposed to be easier to live with, and easier to drive... so has it worked? Ohh... Oh, my God. No... no... no, no, no. No. No. No, it hasn’t.”

See the problem was that the Lotus Sunbeam exploded every time it was Tuesday...

"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

On The Stig: Some say that he was a science experiment gone wrong and that he only eats cheese. All we know is, he's called the stig!

By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

On the Alfa Romeo Brera “Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you?”

Motorized pepper grinder?

WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

I'd have [striking workers] shot. I would take them outside and execute them in front of their families.

The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

On the GT (Between Hammond and Clarkson) Hammond: So with that, the Ford GT gets 75 miles per tank. Jeremy, how far is it to work from your house?" Clarkson: "76 miles..."

There are many things I'd rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.

Much more of a hoot to drive than you might imagine. Think of it if you like, as a librarian with a G-string under her tweed pants. I do, and it helps.

on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

Motor from a food blender?

It's really sad that you can now buy Hummer aftershave. It comes in a jerry can of repressed homosexuality; you slosh it over your face yelling "I'M NOT GAY!"

Clarksonisms

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