Best to you with our ice cream van with a gun on top of it.

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You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

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Jeremy reading the safety labels on a Dodge Viper: This one is my favorite. "The top supports behind the seats are not a roll bar. This is an open vehicle--drive carefully..." No.

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The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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Are there any Spanish people here today? Yes? GIVE ME MY FISH BACK!

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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[On Hammond's Dolomite Sprint] My washing machine moves around the kitchen faster than that!

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On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

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What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

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(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

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Now the interesting thing about this car is that under the bonnet it doesn't have an engine. What you get instead is a small field mouse called Gerald.

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'Tinkering' with it, when you have a Lancia, is just another way of saying 'trying to make it start'. You go to a Lancia, turn the key and think, "Right, I better just 'tinker' with it and see if we can coax some life into the thing".

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on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

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Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

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great news I got this Minecraft Upgrade Code absolutely free! Check this site out http://mc.cardcodes.net

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Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

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On the Alfa Romeo Brera “Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you?”

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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