- Clarksonisms

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

On the Crysler PT Cruiser: "The front looks like a face. A friendly face from the land that gave us friendly fire."

I'm sorry, but having a DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.

Some say that he sucks the moisture from ducks, and his crash helmet is modeled off of Britney Spears' head... All we know is he's called the Stig!

Because of the French the concept if a car doesn't exist anymore

Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

It has dials the size of a fat spaniels face.

'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

There are signs directing you away from Birmingham but nothing enticing you in.

On the Enzo Ferrari “Ferrari is so pleased with it they’ve named it after the founder of the company. They call it the Enzo. That’d be the same as Lotus calling their next car... ‘The Colin.’”

[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

You can't be a true petrolhead until you've owned an Alfa Romeo

Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.

On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

It's not a torch! It's a RAMPANT RABBIT!!

POWER!!!!!!!!!!

Converting a racing car into a street car is like watching porn with all the good bits cut out... all you end up watching is a close up of some sweaty bloke bobbing his head for half an hour.

Clarksonisms

Our Updated iOS App!