most of you will think that showing up in cars like these in romania is like going to somalia with a suit made out of food...

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This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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[In the P45]: "AH LORRY, LORRY, LORRY, LORRY! Oh a lot of poo SHOT out then!"

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[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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A man walked into a bar May he rest in peace

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It's like God having really unusual sex. (On the sound of the Ferrari 430 Scuderia)

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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The only way to stop faster..is to hit a tree.

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Describing the Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder's sound: It's like listening to the Cirque Du Soleil being chopped up by their own chainsaws.

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

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'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

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Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

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Am i the only one here who doesnt know what a clarksonism is?

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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Driving a 1M As if somebody suddenly gave you the permission to set fire to Piers Morgan.

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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Pintos are like virgin girls. You hit one in the rear and BOOM!

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You know what's funny? The Joke below this one.

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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Scientists are trying 2… . figure out how long… . a person can live … . without brain… . . . Please tell them ur age!!! Hindi TV Shows

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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