on Ferrari F430: "the basic price is about 118,000 pound, which is not really bad. I mean, sell the house, sell the children for medical experiment, rob a bank, and you will soon get that money"

Killing a mamooth

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On the TVR Tuscan 2 “You see, my wife loves this car. She loves the noise and the vibrations and the sense of danger and the way that when you over-rev it, the whole dash lights up like a baboon’s backside. Richard Hammond on the other hand, he pretty much hates it. He says it’s too difficult and too complicated and that all the stitching in here looks like the kind of stitching you find when someone’s tried to mend their own shoes.

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

On a Chevrolet Corvette "The Americans lecture the world on democracy and then won’t let me turn the traction control off!”

It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

I do not understand why some people refer to their cars as "She" , lovingly. You never screw your car.

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

On the Ferrari Enzo: MOMMY!!!

the fastest car IN THE WORLD!!

this is the best clarksonism....in the woooorld

(stroking the velvet in a Jaguar XJ) That's like lifting up the Queen's skirt to find out she's wearing a thong!

On cars at a Max Power show "Most of these cars will do 0-60 once....and then they’ll blow up."

Clarkson on Chrysler Crossfire- I have been trying to think -what it is that this shape reminds me of and last night it came to me- you know when a dog....doing its....aahh...number II, that kind of arched back thing .....thats what it is(with hand gestures and disgusted expression).....HIDEOUS!.....EWWWW!!

And after a riged phone vote , The Stig has a new name. He called Cuddles

Okay, engines for the Alfa Romeo Brera: 2.2 liters, 3.2 v6, and you can have a diesel if you're the type of person who thinks the Mona Lisa should have a moustache.

we wait with anticipation

In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

Deal with it

Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

That's not an emergency, it's just time to... empty your bowels.

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

When you're done here, check out our car fail site!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.