Hating jewd isn't rascist, it's actually called being anti-semetist

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On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

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Whatsapp Status

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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Bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks

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Clarkson on Chrysler Crossfire- I have been trying to think -what it is that this shape reminds me of and last night it came to me- you know when a dog....doing its....aahh...number II, that kind of arched back thing .....thats what it is(with hand gestures and disgusted expression).....HIDEOUS!.....EWWWW!!

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... And across the line!

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This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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(On the TukTuk) I think I have cancer now.

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The Ferrari 355 is like a quail’s egg dipped in celery salt and served in Julia Roberts’ belly button.

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On the BMW X5 M There's a gallon of fuel gone there, and another there...and yet another there. As a matter of fact, the only way this car could be less annoying to eco-mentalists is if its engine ran on sliced dolphin.

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide,Power Slide.

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On the McLaren P1: "This car is about as well equipped as a pair of Monk's underpants."

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How many years are there in donkey years?

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Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

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Who ever said Leon Austin is a tramp.. He's not a tramp.. he's just a homeless person living on the streets. Me personally, i think they're different things.

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"Now, Rich, would you like some pussy? (...) PUSSY, energy drink"

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Richard, you're the type of person I could show a picture of Paris Hilton, and you would say "But what if she turned out to be intelligent?"

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There are many things I'd rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.

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It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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