The engine sounds like a Spitfire fighter plane

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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'In Africa' Jeremy: And the Elephants use their noses to shovel water into their mouths. Richard: Thats a rubbish commentary.

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what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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Usually, a Range Rover would be beaten away from the lights by a diesel powered wheelbarrow.

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On the Mercedes SL Black: "there's no point even trying to turn. The steering wheel is useless, this thing has the turning circle of a full moon!"

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Some Poos Come Out

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Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

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...The wheel arches are flared, the car is slightly lowered, and at the back there are extra poo shoots

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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"I’m choosing the words for my conclusion with even more care than usual. So here goes. The 1-series is crap." BMW 1 Series

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What's worse then stubbing your toe? Finding out one of your loved ones died.

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[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

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Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze.

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What's the point of having the fastest car in the world, if its brakes always keep breaking down?

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This is winnie the pooh with road rage

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we wait with anticipation

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What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

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Jeremy on the Pagani Zonda F Roadster: "This car can be vicious, but in an amusing way, like a shark in a funny hat."

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Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

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Supercars are supposed to run over Arthur Scargill, and then run over him again, for good measure. They're designed to melt ice-caps, kill the poor, poison the water table, destroy the ozone layer, decimate indigenous wildlife, recapture the Falkland Islands, and turn the entire Third World into a huge uninhabitable desert... but only after they've nicked all the world's oil.

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"So having a twin turbo V12 diesel is like, turning your central heating off at home, and then keeping warm ... by burning Rembrandts." Audi Q7 V12 TDI

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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