Why did the pharaoh go to Dairy Queen? He was thirsty

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Speed has never killed anyone - suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you. - SMC Digital

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On the Vauxhall Astra VXR No, listen, listen, listen, you won't be at the party if you drive one of these because you'll have torque-steered into a tree on the way. And you'd be killed, and that's important to die in an anecdote...your children will say "daddy died in a fireball in a Vauxhall and a tree!"

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What's the difference beetween a washing machine and a dead body. I dont have a washing machine in my basement...

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POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

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ze5zege ef ege gg

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Today Jeremy Clarkson Married a Lamborghini and move to Switz

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People think my picture of me on horsehead network is me going really fast, good thing they don't know I am actually blowing a huge invisible black guy.

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The BMW X5 M "... And I don't know about you, but I find this interior ... rather boring. Apart from that obviously, the torque thing. It's like sitting in someone's ear."

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On the Ferrari 599 GTO: SPEEEEED, SPEEEED, and the noise of the SPEED!!!

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Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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Claire chris paul steve & dave

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we wait with anticipation

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car goes fast

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Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

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On the Lancia Stratos: I'm going to change gear now; this is going to involve man-touching.

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Where do I like to watch my car videos? You guessed it. CarVideos site

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[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

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The Stig: Some say he was born in space, and that he is illegal in 17 U.S. states.

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It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

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On the Lotus Elise: "This car is more fun than the entire French air force crashing into a firework factory."

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It stands out like

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I'm in the seat of a Ford Sierra Cosworth, holding a flamethrower. Can't get much happier than that.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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