The Caterham may only have 250bhp, but you have to remember that it weighs about the same... as a J-cloth.

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Das Stig is a manaic!

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M3 drivers have no friends.

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on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you know what i think im going to vote tory "..... maybe he did

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On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

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Clarkson on saving money How's this for an idea?...never brake

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Clarkson's highway code on cyclists: "Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong."

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I was driving this [Bentley Brooklands] on a sort of normal B road the other day, and it gave me some idea what it would be like to try and park the moon.

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ze5zege ef ege gg

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Hammond: "The premiums for 17 year old girls are around half what they are for 17 year old boys" Clarkson: "Well there's a Top Gear top tip right there! If you're a 17 year old and you need car insurance, slice your penis off."

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Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

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On oliver top gear car of the year 2007 - "I would rather eat my gentleman vegetables"

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In German accent about Mercedes SATNAV "You must turn around und do it again, make und U-Turn!!!"

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That Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.

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tonight... we test drive... a fiat punto. a VW golf and adam burdass

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I love the feel of some hairy, salty balls on my chin. Mmmmm!

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You know what's funny? The Joke below this one.

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Whatsapp Status

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Regarding driving a Reliant Robin: "What we're about to do is about as dangerous as...inviting your mum over for an evening on ChatRoulette."

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Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

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[on his own driving test] - I didn't see it as a driving test so much as a confirmation of my excelence.

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By the end of the night, I was hoping to be in a rather different kind of hedge, but there you go

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If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.

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[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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