WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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[Alfa Romeo Brera] I only have to imagine this in black, with tan leather, and I'm nursing a semi.

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On the BMW x5 h&m The result is like putting a furious weasel in your underpants

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I don't understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

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When you buy a Honda, well, your stuck with a Honda.

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Shut up with all your terrible banter!!!

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Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.

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On A Lincoln Towncar. I can see him at home with his wife now. Dammit Myrdle! I can't figger out a way to make this wheel square! I got me square dials, I got me a square dash, I got me a square body. But the wheel! it's circular! Ruins the whole KAWR!

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"Lancia did have some issues; for example, the Gamma exploded every time you turned the steering wheel"

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I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

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POOOOWERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!

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Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

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So the Porsche Cayman is a Boxster with a roof. They should have called it the Cockster.

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This is the greatest car ... In the world

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This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

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Grips good, if you want to win a race, grip is brilliant. BUT for drifting.. for having FUN.. grip is BAD!

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It sounds like a bear. A burning bear!

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Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

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On the Porsche Cayman S “There are many things I’d rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.”

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In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

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This [Maserati Quattroporte GTS] is like having a 3-year old child. It's really annoying most of the time, but if someone tried to take it away from you, you'd kill them for it.

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The Amphibian Car Challenge "Which would come first, summer or James May?"

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[On the Citroen Berlingo]: "It's a very good car, so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail'

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ze5zege ef ege gg

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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