- Clarksonisms

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Air Conditioning systems in Lamborghini's of old was like a mouse, coughing on you. Acho. Acho. -Review of the Lamborghini Murcielago LP640

When describing the Mazda Demio-"Yes I know it'll take you to the shops, but then so will a pogo stick!

This is the same colour as a prosthetic limb!!

In Bolivia when a bridge had to be built Clarkson (firing up a chainsaw): I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE Hammond: He's got a chainsaw, hasn't he? Clarkson: OH YES! Hammond: Oh God.

I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

what`s the difference of a blonde and a ufo people have ufos

[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

There are many things I'd rather be doing than driving it, including waiting for Bernard Manning to come off stage in a sweaty nightclub, and then licking his back clean.

I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

Tonight.. Leon finds a bin, Jack sanders takes over the bin, And James may, eats the bin.

WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

On Detroit “God may have created the world in six days, but while he was resting on the seventh, Beelzebub popped up and did this place."

What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

And again, I'm the voice of reason and commen sence

On the mclaren MP4-12C The first thing I would like to know is why they've named it after a fax machine.

Whatsapp Status

(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite.

Listen to this chap. He wants to "bitch slap his hoe" why not. Good luck to ya fella

On the Corvette Z06 “As something to live with every day, I’d rather have bird flu.”

Clarksonisms

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