Q:what's the difference between a blonde and a u.f.o A:people seen u.f.o s

[FSO Polenez] It's less reliable than a pensioner's erection.

Nope, Moral Man the people`s champion does not know either... Moral: Now and forever, I am Moral Man.

Driving most supercars is like trying to manhandle a cow up a back staircase. . .this is like smearing honey into Keira Knightly. -driving the Audi R8

'Jean Alesi - who I used to hero worship - is now playing with my genitals.'

It's like putting a furious weasel in your underpants!

It's perfect for short trips to the golf club. As a matter of fact, the [Mercedes CLS's] Satellite navigation screen only lists petrol stations, and golf courses: everything the modern Mercedes driver needs.

I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch. If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.

I don't always play guitar, but when I do, I'm awesome.

Talking to Hammond along with James: Same Time: "YOUR AN AMERICAN HAMMOND, THAT'S WHY YOU LOVE IT SO MUCH."

Look at this fellow, he wants to bitch slap his hoe. Why not? Good luck to you fellow.

Im you can imagine sharing a waterbed with a baboon drenchd in itching powder On the 70' Lincon TownCar

herro am spoderman

I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member

Doesn't matter if it's Hell in a Cell, Rage in a Cage or Painus in your anus!

on the Peugeot 206 gti the temperature was nudging 75 F and i was headed for London in the 206. After half a mile i was suspicious, after a mile i was angry. it may have an air conditioning button but it sure as hell doesn't have air conditioning. The Rolls-Royce system works with the power of 30 domestic refrigerators. Peugeot's works with the power of an asthmatic in Bangladesh blowing at you through a straw.

On the Citroën Berlingo: You can tell when a car firm is desperate to find things to say about their car, just look at the website: it has a laminated front windscreen, single front passenger seat, and manually adjustable door mirrors. So no electric mirrors, no alloy wheels. So it's a very good car so long as you want something that's equipped like a Romanian jail.

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These newer supercars are much kinder to the environment as well. For example, this one here: the only thing coming out of its tailpipes are baby foxes.

WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

On the Brabus SL: "A 1000 torques is what you'd use for... restarting a dead planet."

What did the black guy say to the brown guy we are both victims I racism

Frederik Du lugter

we wait with anticipation

Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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