The Ford Focus "It's like an Air Hostess wearing orange"

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tonight, james wears jack sanders like a hat, richard wears jack sanders like a hat, and i wear jack sanders like a hat

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I AM CLARK! WELCOME TO DIE X-CHICKEN! MORAL: WHEN IT SAYS MORAL, THAT MEANS THAT YOU MUST NOT GIVE ME THUMBS UPS! I WONT LET YOU BREAK MY UBER MORAL SHIELD!

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During the Bugatti vs airplane trip "I will not be beaten by Captain Slow's flying washing machine!"

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I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.

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On Detroit “God may have created the world in six days, but while he was resting on the seventh, Beelzebub popped up and did this place."

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Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.

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Cadillac SRX4 "This is a very ugly car. So ugly in fact that you’ll want to get inside it and shut the door as quickly as possible. But sadly when you are inside it’s even worse. "If it were a creature, it wouldn’t be a lion or a praying mantis or even a chimp. No, I think it would be a wasp — useless and hateful in equal measure"

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"I never really liked cars nor speed, so from this show and on forward, we are going to show you Japans top ten best poopie in the toilet cameras while we sit here and just fap!" *Audience laughs* "Yes, and we wont fap ourselves! In fact we will blow each other!" *audience gasps then applauds*

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There are footballers wives that would be happy with this quality of stitching... on their face.

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On Gallardo Spyder "I am in love!"

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The M3 CSL is going to be bought by the type of person who lies in bed at night thinking of his gearshift aggression strategy for his drive to work the next morning.

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"How do I tell James to slow down?"

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It stands out like

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Now that we have power steering, all you have to do [to race] is lie down, turn the wheel, and if you want to win all you have to do is go a little bit faster than all the others.

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If you have any thoughts or opinions on what you’ve seen in the last ten weeks, do please keep them to yourselves.

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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[Top Gear Awards]: Now it's time for the ugliest car of the year and the nominees... - actually there's no point is there, it's the Mini Clubman. That's the ugliest.

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In resent weeks a craving for nicotine has made me angry with everything, even trees.

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Biathletes need to eat 6,000 calories a day: six thousand! That’s the equivalent of two pounds of butter, 70 slices of bread, 112 eggs, 86 tabs of yogurts, 28 potatoes, 117 biscuits and 21 Twix bars. On that basis, I could be an Olympic biathlete!

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In a list of the five most rubbish things in the world, I’d have America’s foreign policy at five. Aids at four. Iran’s nuclear programme at three. Gordon Brown at two and Maserati’s gearbox at number one. It is that bad.

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on the corvette: So if you want a car with vietnamese suspension that is made out of plastic, this is the car for you!

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On the Kia Rio, "You may have seen The Fly II, in which a scientist attempts to teleport a dog. In one of the most gruesome scenes I’ve seen in a film it arrives at its destination completely inside out. Well the Rio is uglier than that. Inside, things get worse. "Small wonder Kia’s importer in Britain is sponsoring the Pedestrian Association’s Walking Bus scheme. The idea is that parents take it in turns to walk a group, or "bus", of children to their school in a morning. After three days of being transported in the Rio, my kids thought it was a brilliant idea to walk instead. Even though their school is 18 miles away and it was blowing a gale directly from the Canadian tundra."

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In the WOOORLD...

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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