[On the Clio V6]: It had the worst turning circle in the world - you had to actually go round the world to actually turn it round.

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I believe in speed - power... power and speed solve many things!

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Today, Porsche brings ANOTHER 911 to an already confused world...

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Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable. More comfortable than what... BEING STABBED?

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M3 drivers have no friends.

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I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.

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[In the Police Car Challenge] In jail, no one can here you scream

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"I mean let's be honest about the Bently, it's simply a Volkswagen with some wood grain."

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This is the greatest car ... In the world

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On the Alfa Romeo 8C "as Sir Francis Bacon once said, 'there is no beauty which hath not some strangeness about its proportions'. And he's right, who ever he is. I mean, look at keira Knightley. She's just an ironing board with a face. And she works."

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(Upon seeing a gentleman with shoulder-length hair in the audience): "Jesus is here!"

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Hold on to your spleens everyone!

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I agree the price is a bit steep, it's perilously close to the Ferrari 599, but honestly, you cannot buy a DB9 anymore; you just can't do it.  Because one day, you will be sitting at a set of lights, someone will pull up alongside in one of these and you will feel hopeless and inadequate, and you will have to kill yourself.

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[On the Aston Martin DBS]: "I especially like the gear lever, which is like a Power Ranger's leg"

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On British Leyland: "Never in the field of human endeavour has so much been done, so badly, by so many."

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"And even supposing British cars were terrible, we wouldn't go about saying so. You don't see Jack Bauer saying 'Don't come to America, it's filled with terrorists'!"

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WHAT A MACHINE!!!!

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Speed is the solution to everything, not that I have ever done it, I mean I love speed but, not the other thing, the actual speed, the thing that makes you go really crazy and feel adrenaline curse trough you like hell! No not the stimulant, well actually... ...COME ON YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! (believe it or not, this is how he behaved when drunk 5 years ago, funny guy even when he is not trying to)

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Now we get quite a lot of complaints that we don't feature enough affordable cars on the show… so we'll kick off tonight with the cheapest Ferrari of them all!

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While driving through a rural part of India: "MONKEEEEEEEEEEEY!!!! MONKEY MONKEY.... with MASSIVE testicles!!!!"

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This car was so exciting, I actually needed windscreen wipers on the inside

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What's significant about San Francisco? Nothing really, just gay people.

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Man interviewing clarkson and hammond: What's your carbon footprint like? Clarkson: We dont have a carbon footprint we drive everywhere.

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(Clarksons article regarding his daughters first car) " I wanted something with 2000 airbags, I wanted a bouncy castle with wipers"

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Clarksonisms

Affectionately referred to as Clarksonisms, Top Gear presenter Jeremy Clarkson's quips are the stuff of legends among car enthusiasts...

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